The Fall of a Sparrow
by dusk-dreamer-midnight-thief
Summary: This was originally the opening chapter to my fic The Lesser Good, before I completely changed the direction of the plot. So now it stands on its own. Just a brief glimpse into the lives of the Death Eaters during Voldemort's first war. I am NOT a Death Eater apologiser… just a writer. Rated M. [TRIGGER WARNING: sexual abuse, violence]


**Disclaimer:** All characters you recognise in this story belong to J.K. Rowling. The first bit of text is, as stated, taken from William Shakespeare's Hamlet.

Chapter warnings: Allusions of violence and sexual abuse, swearing.

**The Fall of a Sparrow**

Not a whit, we defy augury. There is special providence in the fall of a sparrow. If it be now, 'tis not to come; if it be not to come, it will be now; if it be not now, yet it will come—the readiness is all. Since no man, of aught he leaves, knows what is't to leave betimes, let be.

Hamlet Act 5, scene 2.

1979.

Two lone and cloaked figures stood side-by-side beside a murky swamp; the forest surrounding them so dense that it obliterated what little light the crescent moon above provided. They had been standing, sitting… waiting… for over an hour.

"Bloody fantastic Saturday night this turned out to be, innit?"

The second cloaked man turned to his partner.

"What would you rather be doing than your duties, I wonder?"

"Duty!" the first cloaked man laughed loudly, "sitting around and waiting for the others while they have all the fun isn't what I'd like to call duty. I can think of a million things I'd rather be doing… drinking, fu-"

"Duty is exactly what it is. We are required to keep a watch-out for their return, and no more shall be said on the matter."

A few minutes went by… the silence only intermittently broken by the frosty January wind that could almost be felt to their bones.

"Only glad it's not raining too!"

"Will you shut-up, Selwyn?"

As if his prayers to not be alone with Selwyn for another minute had been graciously answered, a group of dark figures dressed identically had suddenly appeared in the clearing – their porcelain white masks the only thing distinguishing them from the blackness of their surroundings.

The figure with flowing blonde hair that spilled out from beneath his hood reached the pair first.

"Fruitful night, Lucius?"

"Fruitful enough, Black. Any… disturbances?"

"Not a whisper. If you don't count Selwyn here."

Lucius Malfoy gave the younger man a haughty smirk through his mask. "I am sure the Dark Lord will relieve you of your watchout post next time. We can't be going around having all the fun now, can we?"

The other Death Eaters had now all assembled at Selwyn and Black's stationary post. Some were laughing, others yawning as if coming back from a long day of meaningless work, one simply staring apathetically into space.

Regulus Black watched them for a while, wondering what terrible deeds they had witnessed and had a part in tonight. They would never know how much it had begun to revile him, and how solitary he felt for feeling that way… they all took such pleasure in their deeds, whether it was a petty curse or something worthy of a Dementor's Kiss – it made no difference to the Dark Lord's Death Eaters.

All of a sudden, a piece of cloth had hit him in the face. Regulus scrambled with it before realising it was a torn Muggle shirt with its buttons ripped away. It smelled of bitter, cheap perfume.

"Keepsake. I didn't want you to feel all left out now," came the jovial voice of his striking cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange.

"How very kind of you, Bella."

She smiled affectionately and placed a kiss upon his forehead, it wasn't affection more than it was almost an act of blessing someone with her presence. "Well, all the other men had their fun with the little Muggle bitch, why should my lovely little cousin be deprived of it, hm?"

Regulus fought with all his might to keep his stomach contents inside of him, but kept his facial expressions meticulously unperturbed… he wondered just how much of what they did had been on the Dark Lord's orders. They were not fighting a cause anymore – they were using that cause as an excuse to behave like animals.

A few of the Death Eaters had already apparated away; the "mission" as they called it was presumably over for the night. Bellatrix, her husband Rodolphus Lestrange, his brother Rabastan, Lucius and himself began to walk away from the remaining pack.

"You're all more than welcome to come to Lestrange Manor to continue the night," Bella informed her inner circle. "Bring Cissy along, Lucius."

"I doubt Narcissa would still be awake at this hour," Lucius replied. "But I really should get back to her nevertheless."

"We shall see you both for dinner tomorrow still?" Rodolphus enquired as the group came to a halt in a quieter place to apparate.

"But of course," said Lucius with a courteous bow. Regulus still could not contain his amazement at how gentile the man could be; it was not that he didn't agree with the punishment of Muggles, the more Muggles destroyed the better (if only they could start purging them in greater numbers than just committing horrible deeds on one or two per night), but how anyone could make such a smooth switch from murderer to gentleman like that… it was truly a sight to behold. With a nod to the group, Lucius had apparated away to his wife, another one of Regulus's cousins. One who had been clever enough not to get herself into this fold, into this mess.

"And you, Regulus?" Bella turned her attention to him once more. "I'm sure Aunt Walburga would let you stay away from Grimmauld Place for one night. She knows how good care her niece takes of her favourite son." She lightly stroked his cheek, which made him feel extremely uncomfortable.

"I…" he was about to give into the invitation purely on the premise of not having to be alone with his aching thoughts, but then he turned around and saw something that changed his mind. "… should probably get back to mother. You know she'll be awake all night waiting for news on what we've done."

"Oh, you're such a little mummies boy!" Bella laughed – though it was intended to be affectionate, Regulus still felt a pang of annoyance. "Alright. But we must insist on you coming to dinner tomorrow. Plans must be made, and the Dark Lord must continue to be pleased with my… our… efforts." She spoke his name as if on the brink of physical ecstasy. Regulus could see the silhouette of Rodolphus stiffen; it could not have been easy for him to witness his wife leave day after day to be at her true loves side.

As the three Lestrange's apparated away from the forest, Regulus fiercely tossed the disgusting Muggle shirt as far away from him as possible with a violent shout of anger. He thumped to the ground with his head in his hands, not stirring even as he felt the footsteps of another approaching him.

"You are embarrassing yourself - get up."

"You and I are the only people here, Severus. Unless you're counting the rats." Regulus shot back through the palms of his hands.

"I shall correct myself, then. You are embarrassing me; acting like a child in the middle of a tantrum..."

Regulus gave a sad laugh and looked up at the older man. "Merlin forgive me for not revelling in another petty rape and murder, whatever am I like?" The two men remained silent for a while; Regulus continued to shiver uncontrollably on the ground, while Severus Snape walked over towards the blouse that had caught on a branch and detangled it.

"Urgh, Sev. Don't tell me you're actually considering keeping that," Regulus said with utter disgust.

"Of course I'm not. I am not a pervert."

Could've fooled me.

"What are you doing then?"

Severus heaved a frustrated sigh and held up the shirt to the dejected young man on the ground.

"Know what this is?"

"Some bitch's shirt."

"My stars, did you just come with that cutting riposte on the spot? Sharper than a scalpel..." Severus snapped. "This is evidence. Since you are not willing to conform to your charming cousin Bella's wishes and store it under your pillow then I must dispose of it, lest the Aurors find out about our happy little jaunt because someone saw fit to leave it lying about in the bushes."

"So you didn't just follow my family members and I through the woods to get an invite to dinner tomorrow," Regulus had had just about enough of Snape's condescending attitude towards him. "Just as well. It's about time you realised you'll always be out of the loop."

The way in which he scoffed and casually shoved the torn shirt into his robes dismayed Regulus, which, for someone on the brink of a mental breakdown from the realisation of what he had gotten himself into, was not welcomed one iota. Severus was so cold in all that he did. Everything was calculated and there was such a lack of emotion behind those black eyes that he could surely be dead behind them. Out of all the Death Eaters, it surprisingly had been him, his once friend and confidant at Hogwarts,who disturbed Regulus the most. Snape appeared to get no pleasure out of his acts as the other Death Eaters did, but nor did it seem to distress him as it did Regulus. He seemed to be floating in constant apathetical limbo.

"Why are you here, Snape?"

Severus looked up from his inspection of the surrounds.

"That is no concern of yours."

Regulus shook his head in disbelief. "You don't even enjoy being here."

"People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, Black."

"What? Who's throwing what?"

Regulus did not understand where in the world Severus had pulled that from. Then again, Severus always did have an odd way of speaking… from the terms of references he used and the way in which a strange accent would spill out of his mouth every time he lost his cool, Regulus had been of the assumption that Snape wasn't exactly all he made himself up to be for many years now.

Recognising the other man's confusion and suspicion, Severus cleared his throat. "Never mind. I'd leave now if I were you."

"You know very well I'd die if I left."

"Wha-? I mean the forest, you imbecile, not the…"

Regulus could feel the hairs on the back of his neck stand up from the way in which Severus looked at him.

"You're a fool." He whispered dangerously.

"I didn't say I wanted to leave! You twisted my words like you always do!" Regulus shouted.

"I'm not the one cowering on the grass."

"I'M NOT COWERING, you prick!" all the emotion in Regulus had reached breaking point now. He jumped up and shoved Severus with full force; the elder black-haired man simply stood there stone-faced, as usual. "I thought such a clever bastard such as yourself would see that we are accomplishing nothing by assaulting the occasional Muggle and Mudblood or two! We've lost our way. The Dark Lord has lost his way."

This time, Severus took a step forward - his nose was about two inches from Regulus's.

"Shut-up, you idiot. It's a wonder how your hormonal, pubescent way of acting hasn't got you killed by now. Look at the bigger picture, be patient, and most of all – just be quiet; if not for anyone else's sake then for your own."

"How can you be so blasé about everything? You may act like you're such a man and so much wiser than me - but I know you're really just the same awkward, stringy, lonely boy I knew in school who craved recognition like oxygen!"

For the first time, he saw Severus muscles go rigid.

"Go back to your mother, Black."

And he apparated.

The lonely alleyway was still all but deserted when, with a sound not unlike the cracking of a whip, the nineteen year-old appeared within it. Nothing but the occasional mewl from a distant cat and screeching of car tyres off in the distance…

Behind a dented rubbish bin lay the Muggle woman's body. She looked peaceful and serene; her long blonde hair was still tied up in a ponytail. Were it not for her location one would have thought she had merely settled down to sleep.

Severus calmly drew out the pale blue coloured blouse from his robes; he clumsily placed the cloth over the woman's naked torso while avoiding her eyes… he had avoided her eyes as he stood by in the distance and let his comrades have their way with her; he couldn't bear looking into them now as he re-dressed her. Occlumency gave him the opportunity to perform these acts, and to witness acts, and not break down or retaliate, but he was not sure that was a good thing anymore. He knew what was to come.

As soon as he apparated into the abandoned Spinners End, the protective haven of Occlumency shields came crashing down with a sadistically powerful force. Unable to take the rapid torturous grief that flooded into his mind and his bones, the young Severus Snape stumbled heavily into the banister of the rickety stairs before falling hard to the floor, unable to stand a second longer.


End file.
